Your always gonna be bigger then me
by gizmog
Summary: Hunting and epilepsy don't often go hand in hand but when it comes to Dean Winchester they do.
1. Chapter 1

Sam looked up to his big brother he always had and always would, sure there family wasn't like others and it was true they had no mother, and after the fire that had taken her life they had no permanent address and he never would the only time he did was when he was at Stanford but then that had been short lived.

The main focus of his life was his brig brother, not his father who at every point he would argue against and find a reason to hate him for reason he didn't know but still it helped him cope with how they lived. Not staying in a place to long, always on the road never stopping to long to make friends, to make a new life to have a solid home. All he knew was motels the only thing he ever trusted and believed in was his big brother Dean.

Dean, he is all he ever wanted to be. Sure he aint that smart but he's good looking, he's funny, charming, dads always happy with him, well most of the time, which is much more than he is with Sam. When dads away Dean lets him stay up late, he lets him watch certain things on TV, he talks to him like an adult, he trusts him with secrets. Pretty much he is everything he ever wanted to be.

Even all these years later it's still the same. He might not show it like Dean but he still has nothing but unconditiontal love for his brother, sometimes he finds himself jealous of him, he doesn't mean to it just happens. Which was the case tonight, they were meant to be doing some research on the local history but Dean had ended up checking out the local bar, well more importantly a certain bar maid by the name of Delta, she was quite hot.

It was never him they always fell for Dean, his charm add his looks equals a win win situation, it was a good thing he never took any of them on dates as surely his eating habits would send them running for the hills. If not then his epilepsy might.

As long as Sam had known his brother he had been epileptic. When their mother had been alive they had made sure he was never alone and that he was always with someone who knew what to do in case of the worst case scenario. But since she had died that had gone to, John couldn't sit in every night and make sure that Dean was ok or check that the person looking in on his kids knew what to do. Instead he had given Dean the strict instructions that if he didn't feel right he should go lie down in bed and wait for him. Well this hadn't worked out that well as John had found out.

Pulling the Impala into he motel car park his stomach dropped, the whole place was awash with flashing blue lights, he hope that Dean was asleep so that the lights wouldn't set him off, so far the Doctors had him on a drugs regime that was working and he didn't want anything to mess with it. However as he pulled further in and headed to the parking spot outside his room he noticed that an ambulance had taken the spot.

He heard Mary's voice loud in his head, you don't leave him alone. Promise me John. Sorry Mary. He didn't double check his parking just slammed on and rushed out towards the open door of their motel room. Sammy was stood just outside in his PJ's crying. He couldn't focus on him right now it was Dean he needed to see, pushing past Sam he ran into the room and was confronted by a scene of mayhem.

Dean was lying in the recovery position on the floor. There was blood on the carpet and on his head. Johns eyes immediately betrayed him and let tears run down his face. The two paramedic working on his son looked up, one then went back to work the other spoke. His voice was almost harsh but calming at the same time.

' You must be Dad. Look it aint as bad as it looks, Dean must have cut his head on the table and its caused a bit of a mess is all. Your other son Sam was the one who rung us. Look there both gonna be ok but we need to get Dean to hospital ASAP. Were gonna load him up now. Do you want to come with us or are you going to follow.'

Johns mouth had gone bone dry. All he wanted to do was pick his baby boy up and cuddle him and tell him everything was going to be alright. Finally he said he would follow. He watched helplessly as they loaded Dean into the back of the ambulance and drove off into the night.

Turning to Sam he picked him up and put him the passenger seat, he was angry but worried at the same time. It must have been bad for Sam to ring an ambulance he knew not to ring unless the seizure lasted longer than 5 minutes or that if Dean had another seizure straight after the first. The only other reason was that if Dean was injured and had not woke up.

Sam was crying in the passenger seat.

'He's gonna be ok. What happened Sammy.'

In between tears and breaths John managed to make out the story of what had happened. Sam had woke up and because Dean was not in the bed next to him he had wondered into the living area of the motel room. He had found Dean face down on the floor having a seizure and there had been blood. Sam had panicked and rang an ambulance. Although every part of John wanted to shout at him how could he when he had told him that if he thinks Dean is injured to ring them, and to Sam the blood had been enough. He patted his thigh with his free hand and offered his youngest a smile.

'He's gonna be ok.'

All these years later and them four words still rang through Sams head. Although sometimes he wasn't sure, he still liked the fact that every now and then and when he needed it, he could hear his father's voice, not like he would admit that to anyone least of all Dean.

He was sat on the bed when he heard the room door go, looking at his watch he rolled his eyes, Sometimes he felt like the older disapproving brother, when in fact he was the younger disapproving brother. Dean was meant to be helping with the research on local haunting. Only problem was Dean was Dean and he had found himself with many spirits just not the ones they hunted but most defiantly the ones he drank. Not to mention the appealing Delta.

Sam watched in almost disbelief as a rather inebriated Dean managed to shut the door and then slid down it. Catching Sams eye he smiled and giggled to himself before trying to get back up, only to find that gravity wasn't his best friend at this precise moment in time.

Great this is just what Sam needed tonight a drunk Dean to contend with, and what was worse then Dean being drunk was Dean being drunk and finding everything that Sam did highly amusing. He watched Dean make a few more attempts at getting up, each time failing before he ventured over and helped him get up.

'You gotta lay off the bacon cheeses jerk.' Sam said as he finally managed to pull Dean to a somewhat unstable standing position.

'Take it easy Francis.' This seemed to be highly amusing to Dean, who was in a major laughing fit much to the slight annoyance of his little brother. Who for some reason was guiding him to his bed. He felt himself sit down, he scooted up the bed so he was in a sitting position but his head was rested on the wall behind him.

Sam was stood over him shaking his head. Great he thought how to kill my mood that face. That face Sam always pulled when he didn't approve of Deans antics. Oh well he thought might as well get the lecture out of the way now. Sam had defiantly took the lecture stance, his hands paced firmly on his hips a stern look upon his face.

'Dean what the hell do you think your playing at?'

'Well I thought I was doing research. I checked out the bar.' He stiffelled a giggle.

'Not just the bar but its contents and the barmaids.'

'What can I say perk of the job.' That was it he couldn't hold it in any longer he broke into fits of laughter.

'Well I'm glad you did, you see while you were researching or whatever you call it. I happened to have a little visit from the ghost we've been hunting. Taking it you didn't notice the bruise on my head, god what am I saying how man of me can you see at the moment?'

'Well theres you and then theres you, possibly another you.'

Figuring there was no point continuing this as Dean was in rather drunken state Sam gave up and sat on his bed. Dean was still laughing as Sam closed his eyes, then a noise he hadn't heard in while jolted him awake. That noise that made all the hairs on the back of his neck stand on edge, making his stomach drop and him utter up a pray that, please god let him be ok.

Instinct took over and before he actually registered what he was doing, Sam found himself turning a rigid Dean on his side and counting, it wasn't long before Dean's body was jerking uncontrollably as the seizure took over.

Sam hovered over him watching, feeling like he often did extremely helpless. He knew there was pretty much nothing he could do bar make sure Dean was alright and there was nothing around him he could hurt himself on. The seizure was calming, Dean finally became still. Sam perched at the top end of the bed and stroked Dean's hair, talking calmly to him. He let his eyes check Dean over thankfully he hadn't wet himself this time. Last time that had happened Dean hadn't spoke to him for three days.

He sat there at the top of the bed just waiting for Dean to make a movement or groan just do something. After 15 minutes Sam noticed Deans left hand moving towards his face.

'Wha?'

'Hey Dean its ok, you're ok you just had a seizure. Take it easy.'

'M'kay.' With that silence followed as dean fell asleep and Sam spent the rest of the night perched at the top of the bed watching him.

At some point he must have fallen asleep as daylight was now streaming in through the windows. His body was aching he guessed this probably had something to do with the way in which he must have slept. His eyes found Dean who was still asleep just slightly turned, he must have moved in his sleep.

Stretching Sam got up and headed back to his bed. Figuring that the research was going to have to wait and so was the hunt; they were now officially on a day, if not a few days off. As he sat down he placed his head back so that it was leaning against the wall, much the same as Dean had done the following night. He closed his eyes and let his thought engulf him.

Dean slowly opened his eyes, god his jaw ached, and his tongue, come to think of it pretty much all of him was aching. He felt the dull throbbing in his head, shit this was a hangover and a half. He hadn't had that many, well he didn't think he had had that many. The only time he felt like this was usually after a. No it was nothing more than a hangover. He straightened out and turned onto his back, he turned his head so that it was facing Sams bed.

Sam was stretched out full length, his eyes shut. He looked so peaceful. Dean smiled to himself and then winced in pain as his mouth exploded, to be more precise his tongue and left cheek.

'Sam wakey wake!.'

He watched as Sam jumped awake and searched the room with his eyes before they came to Dean. Seeing that Dean was awake he put his head back on the pillow.

'How you feeling?'

'Not to hot Sammy, got myself one hell of a hangover.'

Oh no something wasn't right, Sam had sat up and turned to face him, Dean didn't like this, this was never a good sign, plus he had his regular Sam bitch face on. Shit he was in trouble, how much had he drunk, even worse what had he done when he got back, come to think of it he couldn't remember leaving the bar.

' Dean you had a seizure last night.'

The realisation washed right over Deans face. That hurt Sam he could see his brother now trying to piece together last night's events, which both of them knew was impossible Dean never remembered his seizures or much about the time leading up to them or after them. Sam watched as Dean looked up at the ceiling lost in his thoughts. Sam knew better then to interrupt him he had done that once and it hadn't ended nicely.

Rather than pushing the matter Sam got up and headed over to the table, grabbed Deans pills out of his bag and a bottle of water from his own bag then passed them over. Dean brought his eyes to Sams, pulled a face and sat up, he took both the water and pills off Sam and took two pills together with a swig of the water.

' Right so whats the plan monkey man.'

Sam rolled his eyes even after a night like that Dean was still a hunter.

'Well the plan is for you to rest up and I'll go get us some lunch.'


	2. Chapter 2

Dean lay there for a while after Sam had left. His whole body ached which was only acting as a reminder of events he could not and would never remember. All he could remember of last night was been in the bar with the barmaid and then waking up this morning. Rubbing absently at his forehead, he finally got up and headed for the bathroom.

He let the warm water wash over him, it somewhat soothed his aching body and was relaxing him. Shit he had been such an idiot. He had forgot to take his medication that morning, but rather then letting Sam know that, he thought it would be much better to let him think that the beer had caused it. Mind you thinking about it now it was probably a combination of the two. Still Dean really didn't want Sam to find out he'd missed his meds. It would only make him worry and that kid already had the weight of the world on his shoulders. Also Dean was the big brother who would go to the ends of this earth to protect his little brother it shouldn't be that Sam had to protect him, it made him feel weak and inadequate. Of course he would never share theses thoughts with Sam.

He faced the wall and let the water run down his back, leaning forward he rested his head on the wall. What a day and it was only, well he didn't know what time it was but Sam had mentioned lunch so he was guessing mid day ish. He closed his eyes, even as a kid he had dealt the same way with his seizures, carry on don't let them stop you honey, his mums voice echoed in his head. He smiled at that, all these years later and the words he had heard when he was four still echoed around his head. The fact that he had seizures was something he had just had to deal with, his dad had never made an issue of them well not really, there had been that one time though.

They had been trailing a vampire, the three of them. After two solid days of following they found its nest and went in. Dean had been feeling a bit off that particular day and by the time they had reached the nest he really wasn't with it at all. Neither Sam nor his dad had picked up on it though as Dean had come accustomed to hiding things from the pair of them quiet well.

The inside of the shack that the creature called its home was badly lit and bits of old wood and what looked like various gardening tools littered the floor. This wasn't one of your Ann Rice vampires Dean thought stepping over yet another peice of lumber and then nothing. Next thing he knew he was being held by the throat by a rather skinny but tall man. God was he tall Deans feet were most defiantly off the floor. He couldn't figure out how the vamp had got him, he had been stepping over the wood, then what.

He could feel the tightness of the grip on his throat, he struggled but it was to no avail this vamp was strong. He was finding it hard to breath and the room was getting further and further away till it had faded to blackness.

Cold leather was underneath him, well that wasn't right. Opening his eyes he found that he was curled up on the backseat of the Impala. But how, his head was not with it at all. Sitting up he noticed Sam turn around and stare at him, his eyes looked red and puffy. This was worrying what the hell had happened.

'Hey there.' Sams voice sounded off, something wasn't right. That was the only words spoken in the car until they got back into the motel room. John had made him sit at the small wooden table in the kitchen area and sent Sam to bed.

This wasn't good and the look that Sam had given him as he stalked off to bed was only enforcing this. Shit what had happened. He let his eyes wander around the room. It was like so many of the other non-descript rooms he had spent much of his life in. Sometimes they didn't even have a kitchen area. His eyes continued roaming the room trying to look everywhere but at his father.

A pair of fingers clicked right in front of his face and he was forced to finally look at his dad. As usual his face was not easy to read. He had a bruise coming through, right down his left cheek, and there was a cut above his right eyebrow that at some point had been bleeding but now had scabbed over, still remnants of the blood that had come from it were visible on Johns face. Shit looked like the hunt had been a rough one.

'You gave us a scare kiddo.' Dean instantly felt his stomach drop, he could feel heat rising him and he knew that at some point soon the probability of him being sick was quite high..

'Dean you in there.' His dads voice had a slight hint of worry in it. This only made Dean feel if possible worse. He tried to answer but found himself mumbling something and nodding.

'Dean , you gave both me and Sammy a scare back there. You know the vamp had you and it was just about to take your head off, if I hadn't got there when I did, well I don't want to think what would have happened.' He wiped his hand across his brow and focused on his son sat in front of him. Shit he had come so close tonight to losing him, perhaps I should leave him at home in future, he'd be safer. Yeh but would he, what if he had a seizure while me and Sammy were out. Shit. Mary I am so sorry.

'I'm sorry dad I don't know what happened one minute I was stepping over something next thing I know it had me.' Dean hated the way his voice sounded, it was weak and almost pleading. Shit he must have had a small seizure and blacked out. Realisation hit him hard and he tried to fight back the tears and anger that was welling up inside of him. Why him?. He clenched his hands into fists and then slammed them down hard on the table. Getting up he walked towards the front door.

'Hey you come back here just where do you think you're going.' Johns voice had grown considerably louder. In the bed room Sam put his head on his pillow and let silent tears run down his face.

Dean didn't bother turning to face him, which John took as odd as Dean always faced him, Sam, well that was another story but Dean was never disobedient or rude. The reason why Dean didn't turn to face him was simple, tears had escaped his eyes and were making their way down his face.

'You'd be better off without me.'

He felt hands on his shoulders and turned round slowly. His dad, so tall, looked at him.

' No we wouldn't and don't ever think that. It's just, well it's just something were going to have to work with. Look go and get some sleep.' He should hug him, but John hadn't done that for a while it wasn't in him anymore. Dean nodded wiping his eyes he went into the bed room and sat on his bed. He didn't even look over at Sam and was quite relieved when Sam didn't acknowledge him coming into the room.

John went to the side counter picked up a bottle of whiskey and went back to the table opened it and drank. He knew it wouldn't sort anything but right now he needed a drink he would think tomorrow. Right now they were all safe and that was enough to satisfy him for tonight.

He turned the shower off and got out trying to ignore the emotions the memory had brought back to him, once dry he put on a pair of rather battered looking jeans and a black t shirt. He lay back on the bed and let his thoughts drift but couldn't do it for too long. They were on a hunt after all. Surely they should be out there doing their job. They couldn't just take a day off that might make the difference between saving a life and someone dying and that wasn't something Dean wanted on his conscience.

Sams head wasn't really with it as he stood in the queue at the small dinner a couple of minutes drive from where they were staying. He hadn't even checked the menu, well what was the point so long as it was a burger, with cheese and bacon and then maybe more bacon Dean would be happy. The queue was moving that was one thing. His thoughts were solely focussed on Dean. At least he had spoke to him which was always a good sign but he knew that this seizure would have him beating himself up. He wished there was something he could do but knew there wasn't he had tried that a while back and was politely told to get lost.

'What can I get you hun?' it was a rather plump woman with a beehive hairstyle, she looked as if she had walked straight out of the fifties. Sam smiled at her.

'Can I get two bacon chesses to go and a grilled chicken salad. Oh and do you have any pies at all.'

'Yeh we got apple, cherry and chocolate.'

'Piece of apple as well please.'

Getting back in the car he smiled pie would cheer Dean up it always did. He turned the key and put his foot down not daring to change the Metallica tape that was playing, he did however turn it down.

He was shocked to see Dean waiting for him outside the room as he pulled the car into the space. There was a determined look all over Deans face, before he even got out of the car the passenger door had opened and Dean was now sat next to him.

'Dean what do you think you're doing?' he didn't want to sound like he was telling him off but his voice did have a hint of an angry teacher telling off a pupil.

'Well were meant to be on a hunt so let's go get it done. Come on foot down lets go and get it.'

'Look all I want you to do today is take it easy, the hunt can wait, at least for a few hours. Come on I got your favourites.' God now he sounded patronising, what was he going to do next pick the bag of food up and wave it in front of Dean? He offered a apologetic smile to his brother.

'Just an hour then and then we go.' Dean resigned himself to the fact that he wasn't going to be going anywhere without Sam.

He sat on his bed and Sam handed him the bag. Well at least his kid brother did good with the food and he had brought pie. The burgers were good, cooked just the way he liked. He wolfed them both down in quick succession while Sam picked at his salad.

Dean hadn't realised just how hungry he was, the pie was good as well always a bonus mind you he had never had a piece of pie he didn't like even when it had been bad. He knew that Sam was only trying to look out for him but that didn't mean he had to like it. Still it could be worse he thought.

'So what did you find out about the ghost then.'

Sam studied a piece of lettuce on his fork and deciding he really wasn't that hungry put it down. There was no way he was going to be able to keep Dean in this room for the rest of the day.


	3. Chapter 3

'Whoa, back up it came here?' Dean could hear the shock in his own voice, in all the years of hunting he couldn't think of a time when a ghost had actually turned up at where they were staying. This wasn't a good sign it meant that this one had somewhat a free will and could travel were ever it liked. He didn't like the thought of that at all.

'Yep, came straight threw the wall screaming at me, grabbed me and threw me against the door, hence the bruise. Then and this is where it gets even weirder it just left. I don't know I think it was giving us a warning or something but I think I've figured out who it could be.' Sam rubbed at his brow, god he looked rather stressed today, mind you after the night he had just had Dean wasn't that surprised.

'Oh where is it.' Sam went to his bed a riffled through the numerous books, bits of paper and local newspaper cuttings until he found a small little paper book. He passed it over to Dean. Looking it over it was defiantly a cheap tourist book for ghoul seeking people. The pair of them had seen so many of these throughout their travels, especially of late. It seemed to be the best way to get people into to staying at failing hotels was to sell them the fact it was haunted. But they had never taken one seriously before.

'This?'

'I know it doesn't look like much but it's where I started and I think I got us a lead plus with it turning up last night I'm pretty sure it's the woman mentioned in the book, oh page ten.' Dean was shocked that they had actually spent time numbering the pages.

**The screaming shadow**. Dean had to role his eyes at the title, it was something straight off a low budget horror DVD you'd find in the bargain bucket of any gas station. But he started to read all the same if only to please Sam.

_The spirit of Elizabeth Parry or she has now become known the Screaming Shadow, is a much talked about spirit in this local area.. To date she has been witnessed by over a hundred people, both residents and tourists have reported sightings of her. The first one being in 1960 by a young couple that moved into her house._

_It was their first and last night in the property which is still standing to this day. The young woman awoke to the sound of screaming's echoing through the walls. Then an uncast shadow appeared and made its way towards the end of the bed, she immediately woke her husband. This turned out to be the worst thing, as the shadow lifted off the ground and hovered for a few seconds above her husband then with an ear piercing scream it lifted him off the bed and __repeatedly__threw him against the wall. It showed no mercy nor was it affected by the young woman's screams._

_Eventually the screams woke a neighbour who quickly rang the Sheriff's department who quickly dispatched two sheriffs. This is the account of Sheriff Davies._

_As we got out of the car you could hear the screams I've never heard anything like it before or after and never want to again. Me and Dan entered the property and quickly headed upstairs. The young woman was sitting on the bed screaming and the young man, well what was left of him was pretty much all over the walls. It was then that I noticed it, this tall odd looking shadow that didn't seem to be cast by anything, and then it flew at me knocking me to the ground. I never stepped foot in that building ever again._

_The woman that the spirit is said to be is that on a local resident who was known as Elizabeth Perry. At the age of 19 she was engaged to a man named Michael Scotland, unfortunately on the wedding day for reasons unknown he never turned up, and was never seen again. her wedding day was the last time she was seen in public that is until her funeral in 1959._

_It is said that she was so upset by being jilted that she locked herself away. Over the years that followed she became increasingly warped and twisted. Festering in her own depression and becoming a real life Miss Havisham. During the years local children would dare each other to knock on her door. The ones brave enough to do so reported hearing the most inhuman screams echoing through the door._

He put the book down and looked at Sam.

'Seriously.'

'I know how it looks but Dean I saw it and it fits the description and it turns out that there was a woman who lived her called Elizabeth Perry.'

Dean rubbed at his forehead. His head was hurting, It was probably their best lead god Sam had been busy while he had been, well he had been busy to. Just not in the same way. This made him smile a little, childish he knew but still.

' So we go to the house and find whatever part is left of her and torch her.'

'Yep that's about it but I've been thinking.' Dean didn't like the sound of that and he had a strong idea of where this was going.

'Now am just throwing this out here, but well I can go and do that while you stay here and rest.' Sam was hoping that Dean would be reasonable but deep down he wasn't sure.

Dean was silent. He couldn't quite believe what he had just heard, so that was Sams plan, he would go out gank the god dam thing and then come back here and check in on his older brother. It hurt. It really hurt and Dean was trying to be calm. Yet he could feel anger inside him growing. So Sammy thought he was useless and a risk, well screw him. Without saying a word he got up and walked out of the room slamming the door behind him. The fresh air hit his face, he tried to calm his breathing and the anger that was at any moment about to come out of him.

He stood still for a while breathing in and out, his eyes focussed on the Impala. God he loved that car not that he'd been able to drive her for a while and wasn't likely to be driving her again anytime soon. If anything Sam would definably put his foot down on that front, mind you his dad had as well. Dam that had hurt back then the one thing he wanted to do more than hunt was to drive her. He felt the tears rising behind his eyes rubbing at them he decided he'd better move on so headed off finally stopping in front of a soda vending machine. He turned to face it and momentarily thought about buying one, but the anger was too much, the hurt was too much, he hit it, he hit it over and over.

Sam stood there for a few minutes trying to calm himself down. He had only wanted to keep Dean safe and make sure he was ok. But now it seemed he had made the wrong decision yet again. His stomach was in knots and water had flooded his mouth, he rushed towards the bathroom and was instantly sick. Wiping his mouth he sat on the floor, his throat was burning and his stomach still was heaving but there was nothing left to come back up. Shit the last thing he had wanted to do was upset his big brother. While sitting on the floor he considered how he would have felt and had to agree he would have acted the same way. With this in mind he thought he would give Dean a few more minutes' head start before he went out to look for him, then it dawned on him the Impala, what if he had taken her. Not again, not after last time surely his brother had more sense than that. He shot up and out of the room, the door slamming behind him.

The Impala was where he had left her, he felt stupid for even think that Dean would take her then guilt crept through him did he really think that little of his big brother. The man who had been more of a farther to him then John had. He breathed in a bit hoping that the guilt would subside long enough for him to focus on finding Dean and then getting this hunt out of the way.

He didn't have to look too far as Dean had only made it to the soda machine all of ten doors down. Slowly and with reservations he approached him. The machine had defiantly seen better days, only one person could have done that to it and he was now stood right behind him. He hadn't realised it but apprehension had built up inside him and now that he had found Dean he wasn't quite sure of what he should say or do. He hated being in this position, it wasn't the first time and he doubted that it would be the last but still he never liked being in it, and each time he promised himself he wouldn't find himself in it again.

Dean had heard Sams enormous feet coming a mile off, he knew he was stood right behind him but right now all he wanted to do was hit him hard in the face. He wanted him to feel how he felt and since he knew that was never going to happen hitting him was the next best step. Deep down he knew he was being childish about the situation but dam it he was hurt. He also knew that although hitting Sam square on in the face wasn't going to stop him feeling the way he did it would only make him feel worse. Still these thoughts rushed through his mind and he was finding it hard to stop them happening.

'Dean?' Sam voice was awfully quite, was that a hint of worry that Dean was picking up on.

'Dean?' yep defiantly worry. A childish smirk spread over Deans face. Yeh you worry about how I'm gonna react now, shame you didn't think about that before you excluded me from this hunt.

'Dean?' just you carry on Sammy, one more and I swear I am gonna... it was too late before he realised what he was doing, Dean had turned round swinging at Sam. One blow to the face and Sam was now on the ground looking up at him. Shit.

'Am guessing I kinda deserved that.' Sam pushed himself up off the ground and rubbed at his jaw, Jesus Dean had one hell of a punch on him, it was obvious why other hunters were wary of him.

Dean just watched as Sam got to his feet, even though Sam was younger he was still taller which at this moment in time was only serving to annoy Dean, his thoughts were all over the place and the majority of them were angry, angry at himself, angry at his epilepsy, angry at Sam, angry at the fact that his kid brother literally looked down on him. He could feel it all building again everything coming to the surface.

'Dean look I didn't mean to, well you know hurt you, I was just thinkin.'

'Yeh your good at that aint you, I mean let's face it, have you ever thought about anyone but yourself.' Even he knew that was a low shot but right now he didn't really care. He just wanted Sam to leave him to calm down.

'There's no point talking to you when you're like this.'

'Good go then.' god he sounded so whiney. Sam rolled his eyes at him and then turned and walked back towards the room. Leaving Dean stood there with some many thought rushing round inside his head. He slid down the vending machine and put his head in his hands and closed his eyes focussing on his breathing.


	4. Chapter 4

Sam slammed the door behind him, running his hand through his hair, he stared at the room in front of him. The rooms always seemed the same to him. They were in personal, the same drab decor, the lack of personality, and no personal touches. Actually come to think of it there was nothing to say that anyone had stayed in this room before them. As a child he had hated them and now as an adult he felt at home somewhat in them. Not as much as Dean but then that was Dean he could call any where home, even the back of the Impala.

Sitting on the bed he pushed the notes, books and other various literature to the bottom of the bed then pushed himself up so he could lean on the wall behind. Shit the last thing he had wanted was to cause a fight, why did it feel that no matter what he did it always went wrong. Every time, had he ever done anything right. Thinking now he wasn't sure he had, even running away to Stanford. All he ever seemed to do was hurt people close to him, his dad, his brother and Jess, it was all his fault. His head fell back against the wall and he focussed his eyes on the ceiling hoping to silence the voices that were shouting at him from the back of his mind. Finally he closed his eyes and hoped that the blackness that engluffed him would silence his head.

'You ok there buddy.' It wasn't Sams voice, Dean raised his head, thankfull that his eyes hadn't betrayed him like he thought they would. A young man looked down at him.

'Yeh, sorry rough night was er looking for my room.'

The young man smiled at him, don't think its down there buddy he laughed and carried on his way. Takeing it as a hint Dean got up and headed back for the room. Shit he must have left his keys in the room, he hated knocking. Still he did it.

It didn't take long for a rather surprised looking Sam to answer, he stood in the door way for a couple of seconds staring blankly at Dean. The first thought to run through Deans head was, do I look like that when I black out?. Sam moved for him so he could get through the door.

'Dean. Look I didn't.' He didn't need Sam to finish what he was saying so he lifted his hand, this was the best tactic he had discovered for shutting Sam up and one he regularly used. Plsu Sam shouldn't really be saying anything if anyone had to apologise it was him, but deep down he didn't want to, god he sounded like a brat.

He sat on the end of his bed and looked up at his younger brother. When did he get so old. It only seemed like weeks since he was a scrawny teenager who was haveing problems fitting in, the little kid who looked up to him, the little kid he could always open up ot. When did it all change. He couldn't pin point it, but somewhere down the line things had changed and so far they hadn't gpne back. deep down inside him he knew they never would, after all you cant go back.

Sam seemed somewhat lost in his own thoughts to, he wore his typical 'I'm thinking face.' Dean kept his eyes on him for a further five minuetes before lying down and closing his eyes.

Sam had thought it would take a while for Dean to lye down, but was relieved to find his estimations wrong. He waited thirty minuetes until he quietly got up and left the room, pulling the door shut as quietly as he could. He opened the Impala and turned the key. His mind was awash with thoughts. He knew he should have stayed and that this was if anything only gonna make Dean madder at him but at the same time they had a job to do, and Dean was in no fit state to be hunting tonight. All he wanted was for his bog brother to rest up was that really to hard a thing to ask for.

He hadn't realised just how far he had driven and was quite shocked to find himself on the outskirts of the town going in the opposite direction to where the house was. Checking the mirror he pulled a U tunr in the road and headed off in the other direction.

He had heard the front door open, well actually he had heard the mattress on Sams bed creak as his brother had got up and then snuck out. He had felt his heart sink but wasn't really that shocked at his little brothers actions. Maybe if the table were turned he would have done the same, still it hurt. Pushing himself up he wandered round the room, pacing as he tried to think of his next move. One thing was for sure he wasn't going to be staying here waiting for Sam to get back. Getting to the door he realised he didn't have a clue where Sam had gone to, he had mentioned the house but not where about it was. Shit he rushed over to Sams bed and started riffling threw the papers on Sams bed. He came across the small paper booklet and checked in it, all it said was that the house was still there today, well that was usefull. No address anywhere, shit. He didn't want to phone Sam, no doubt he would only be told to rest and that he would be back soon. Right now is the time for decisive action he thought as he closed the door behind him heading for the reception.

The bell jangles as he pushed open the reception door. As receptions for motels went this wasn't that bad, it wasn't that good though either trying to place it Dean settled on the indifferent pile. It was small and kitch, stale smoke loitered the air and the once white patterned wall paper now had a nicotine tint to it. The front desk was smart enough a lamp that had seen better days stood at the far side while a nice little faux gold plaque took center stage. A thought that a bell wouldn't be amiss in this setting ran through his head and he stiffeled a giggle. Behind the desk was another door which he guessed would lead to the living room of the owners. Standing at the desk he found himself watching a major flashback that exploded in his head and played for his eyes only.

The room was small and badly lit, the walls were yellow and the heavy stink of smoke filled the air. He looked up at his dad, he smiled down at him.

'Its only for one night.'

John stood at the grimy reception desk and hit the small desktop bell, that seemed to be about the only thing that was clean, he smiled to himself. A gruff voice shouted something intelligible from behind the closed door, slowly it opened and a rather frail look old man popped his head out, a half smoked cigarette protruded from his wrinkled mouth.

'Yes Sir, what can I do you for.' He shuffled behind the desk, Dean was rather shocked that the old man was the same height as his dad. He was such a shell of a man where as his dad was everything he wanted to be when he grew up.

'I'm from room 218 and was just wondering if you could recommend a babysitter in the area, see I have a meeting first thing tomorrow morning upstate and I don't want to have to drag my kids out with me.'

The old man looked John up and down, he shuffled to the left somewhat bent down and pulled out an old phone book. He rifled through the pages until he finally stopped. Pushing the book round he pointed at a number.

'That's Janey Shrivers number she's good, give her a call.'

'I don't want to be a pain but could I use your phone.'

'Hello. Sir. Hello.' Dean shook his head, it had gone a young rather good looking woman was behind the desk, she looked at him with a slight hint of worry.

'You ok?'

'Yeh, am fine sorry. Erm, was wondering if you could help me with something.' Shit how long had he been stood there.

'Well I'll try my best.'

'Am looking for the, now this is gonna sound corny but the haunted house.' He offered up his best smile and cheekiest eyes it seemed to work she was smiling back at him.

'You mean Elizabeth Perry's house, yeh basically turn left out of here and continue down Elm till you reach the turn for Cedar take that and it's the last house on the left, you can't miss it.'

'Thank you.' She slipped him a piece of paper smiled again and went back behind the door. Opening the paper he wasn't shocked when it was her phone number and the time she got off. smiling he placed it in his back pocket. He might be done by eleven.

_**I hope you'r liking it so far **_**:)**


	5. Chapter 5

Sam pulled up at the kerb and looked up at the house, to be fair it looked like most of the houses on this street just a little unloved. But if his research had proven right it would mean that no one had spent more than a couple of nights there. Mind you most of the places that people would class as haunted wouldn't be. Over his time on the job it always came as a surprise when the house was a stereotypical looking haunted house, and the occasion they had visited them had been few and far between. He checked the road making sure no one was coming and got out going to the trunk. Looking over his shoulder, it felt odd without Dean been next to him pulling his things out the back and then heading off together. Still Dean was safe and asleep, it wouldn't take him long to get this job done. Checking one more time just in case he took out the pump action and a book of salt shells and quickly stored them in the front of his jacket, closing the trunk as quietly as possible he walked up the path.

The garden at some time in its life had been loved and also it had been tended lately as well, it wasn't over grown or full of weeds just a bit unruly, it was almost as if the owner had gone away on holiday. He had to give the house something it did have a presence about it, it was quite thick that straight away he understood why people would try and avoid it. Overall the place had a distinct air of depression and it was consuming. Taking a deep breath he tried the door, it opened.

Inside was much the same as outside it looked as though the owner had simple gone away. Although the last full time owner of the property had been Elizabeth it seemed as though even the would be thieves and looters weren't stupid enough to touch the place or the things that had been left inside. Hopefully he would be able to find whatever it was that was keeping her here and send her off.

God this would have been quicker if he had hot wired a car but no, that wasn't going to happen any time soon. He had driven in the past on dirt roads in the middle of no where with his dad beside him in the passenger seat. But he had never driven on the roads, well bar the one time he had thought it would be a great idean to take the Imapala for a spin in the middle of the night. He had thought that both Sam and hid dad were asleep, they were both up waiting for him when he got back. the lecture he ahd received that night had stayed with him ever since.

John had sat him at the table, Sam was already sitting his head down, dam even back then he was good at avoiding eye contact at certain times.

' Juts what in the hell do you think your playing at, well answer me. No. Nothing to say on the matter. Where do you want me start Dean, with how stupid youve been. After all I have done to keep you safe and you go and do something this stupid. What would your mother think. I know you want to drive but that aint gonna be happening until the meds are working right until then your rideing shotgun buddy. Do you have any idea of what could have happened if you had had a seizure at the wheel, well do you. You could have killed someone, you could have killed yourself and all for what. This stupid need to prove something. Just what is it your trying to prove.'

'I just wanted to drive her dad, on my own.' Hopeing this would be the end of it Dean had glanced at Sam, whose head had risen somewhat but still his eyes looked down. Dean could feel how awkward he felt. Sam had been driving what two years now and his older brother was getting laid into for taking the car for a quick spin. To be truthfull the consequences of what could have happened had rushed threw his head but he had taken odds that most people would be ion bed and there wouldn't be many cars out at this time. God all he wanted was to feel what it was like to driver her alone.

'Dean I understand that and when the meds are working it will be the first thing we do. But until then you aint driving anywhere got it.' Dean nodded his head and felt shame and anger rush threw him.

Just the sign he was looking for he turned onto Ceader and began to jog. He had never been able to gain his licence, sure he had fake ones printed out and they were good quality they would pretty much fool most of the authoritys. But he wasn't prepared to take the risk of what if. He had made it pretty much half way up before he slowed for a minuete then picked up his speed again. finally he reached the end of the street. The last house on the left, it looked just like any other house on the street. In fact he had exactly the same thourgths on the places as Sam had. The imapala was parked neatly at the kerb, checking over his shoulder he made his way up the path. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary and although he would never admit this to anyone he could feel the slight hint of apprehension rising in him. Taking a deep breath he pushed on the front door.

It opened easily, he was rather thankfull for that the last thing he wanted to waste time doing know was picking the lock to an old house.

'Sammy?' his voice carried through the house, a strangled cry responeded but he couldn't quite figure were it was coming from, till he heard it again and charged the stairs. There was a small landing and three shut doors. He kicked at the first one and the crys got louder. The room was empty.

The next room was far from empty, the door gave way to his kick quite easily, as it opened he saw Sam pinned to the far wall next the window surrounded by a, he couldn't quite believe his eyes, it was most defiantly a shadow. He could tell from the outline that it was a woman, thee way the shadow flared out at the waist was what gave her away.

'Hey there do you two need a minuete.' He couldn't quite tell if she turned to look at him but Sam seemed to slide a bit down the wall, so she had defiantly let go of her grip on him. A short wave of relieaf rushed through Dean as the shadow drew nearer to him. She didn't rush in fact it appered she was takeing her time. He quickly glanced threw her and saw Sam lieing on the floor coughing and wheezing.

A coldness griped him around his throat, it seemed to be tightening aswell as the coldness rushed threw his body. Breathing became harder from both the pressure and the cold. All he could see in front of him was a black mass. He could feel his breaths becoming shorter and more rushed as her grip tightend. Kicking out did nothing, how could it but still he tried. The black mass seemed almost to be looking him the eye or at least that was the idea he was getting. He tried to focus but it was becoming harder and harder. Then nothing.

Sam felt his stomach drop as he saw Sean slide down the wall his eyes exposing only the whites. The showdown hung over him, almost hovering. A dull pain exploded down his back as he rushed to get up.

'Hey.' He couldn't be sure but he was pretty certain that the attention of the shadow was now firmly on him, he couldn't tell if it had turned but it was defiantly moving towards him. Crouching down he found the shot gun he had dropped. The shadow was almost upon him by the time he stood back up.

It towered over him, almost looking down on him, he cocked the gun and shot. For a few seconds it seemed to do nothing and Sam could feel his heart racing, then with an almighty shriek the shadow ripped in half and vanished. He steadied his breathing and ran his hand through his hair pushing it back.

He knelt down beside Dean and checked he was breathing, there was a bruise starting to form on his neck but at the moment this wasn't a major concern the main thing was Dean was breathing and they could get the hell out of here.

Dragging Dean up, god he needed to lay of the double cheese burgers he semi carried him out of the house, lay him down on the back seat. Got in the front and drove off.

He was moving he was sure of that but couldn't figure out how, opening his eyes he found himself in the back of the Impala. Slowly he sat himself up and rubbed at his neck, his throat was sore and so was his head.

'Sammy?' god his voice was croaky.

'Dean, jus lie down well be back at the motel in a few. Get some rest.' He couldn't decipher whether Sam was annoyed or concentrating. Deciding it was probably best to not wind him up this time Dean sat back and closed his eyes.

'Dean, you ok were back come on.'

The room looked the same as before, mind you rooms like this never changed apart from when the cleaner had been in. But they always left the do not disturb sign on the door. He walked over to his bed and lay down on it, closing his eyes.

He felt the mattress go down at the left corner that could only mean one thing, Sam had perched himself on it and was probably going to spend the entire night there. dean opened his eyes, god it must have been a rough one Sam looked exhausted.

'Sammy, get some sleep.'


End file.
